#3 Grind to Dust ✨

Grind culture is pretty much a death trap. What we often need is to work healthier - not just harder. I have some thoughts to share..

Month 2/12 of 2023 is officially over! Most of us have taken some time to relax, but now it is March and I have been sprung back into my regular scheduled programming of - GET PAID, PAY BILLS, DO TAXES, SLEEP and REPEAT (God, taxxess.. am I right). Although I most definitely will always be a hard worker, this year I hope to have a different method to the madness, namely, a healthier method.

What does working hard look like to you? How has it been taught to you? Where are the beneficial lessons, and where are the unhealthy patterns in your relationship with working and success? Ultimately, how can we reimagine ‘working hard’ to better account for mental, physical and emotional fulfillment, for ourselves and our communities.

Advances in knowledge emerge from the pursuit of valid results. That pursuit calls for a different set of tools and processes and, indeed, a different sort of organization.

— Roger Martin, The Design Of Business

In my life I have known and seen in the examples of my elders, that work should be the number 1 priority. We sacrifice personal for professional, we lose sleep for extra hours, we forgo special events for overtime, we miss out on time with family at the strategically worded request of an employer; anything to make that money, put food on the table and keep a roof over our heads. This has been my example of ‘working hard’, I grew up believing that work is a means to survival with an ever-present scarcity mindset. Don’t get me wrong though, I know work is necessary and money must be made to survive, especially in this western capitalist culture I seem to be building my life in. So, money does unfortunately make the world go round, and without work there is no money, and without money basic needs go unmet. For me, this understanding was the only perception I had on what work and life looked like. It created a looming anxiety and fear that everything could be taken away from me if I didn’t work hard enough. A skewed and somewhat damaging mindset for a child, yes. A challenge to dream big and think differently, absolutely!

For some, work allows them luxuries, not just necessities, it allows for purpose, it can be a means of growth, exploration or passion. I knew at a young age that this relationship I saw others had with work, was always what I had hoped to achieve. Much of my generation, especially those like me, who are second generation to low-income or working class immigrant parents, have been placed in a peculiar position of shifting this perspective of what work is, and can look like for our families. Without a doubt I can say that the ‘pull up your bootstraps’ during hard times - survival, approach is what gave me an incredible drive, strong work ethic, steadfast commitment and a determination to succeed against all obstacles. This of course can come with some strong external, and maybe even self-imposed, pressure and expectations.

I try to remember everyday that I get to work in a field I love, be creative, expressive, free and passionate in my work. Something that I might not have been able to say, without the effort and sacrifices that my family has made for my future. The overflowing gratitude that I feel is something I cannot take lightly. So in order to create a good foundation, I try to dream with balance, abundance and health in mind - ridding myself of this relationship to work that has been passed down by generations, that tells me I must ‘work hard’ only to survive.

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As a freelance wardrobe stylist and a budding marketing professional, there is no real guidebook or structure that says follow these steps, take this path and you will get the future and success you are hoping for. No, you have to: research, build, plan, try, fail, reinvent, reassess and try again. It’s a lot of work and I am faced with a lot of questions, that I sometimes may or may not be able to find answers to. Pursuing a life of entrepreneurship was terrifying to me, and I was in denial of that path for myself for a long time, maybe up until 2020. The thought brought a lot of fear, insecurity and uncertainty into my life and honestly, it still does. I fight the urge to give up, quit and say goodbye to my dreams often, but I know that it would be a waste of the important vision I now have for myself and my community.

I went to school for business instead of arts, I majored in marketing instead of fashion, I started working in an office to leave the service industry behind. I had been taking steps that had felt like they would allow me opportunities to create stability and security in my life and for my family. In this pursuit, I undoubtedly succumb to my unhealthy work patterns and beliefs. Forgetting that I have always had a heart to give, to nurture, to educate, to commune, to create.

When I first worked for a brand that I used to see on TV, or in window displays, or on my kitchen counter, I felt excitement. Now, I at times feel like I had accomplished something I had never really been striving for. Was it representation? Acknowledgement? Approval? Status? All of the above… none of the above. Im not sure. I would find myself chasing after my next job, pay or big opportunity, but danger comes from an aimless pursuit, and often times you make it to the end of that journey and find you are unfulfilled. I work with my head into the ground sometimes, then look up and wonder what it is I have been working towards. There is time for work to be just work, when there is no need for an exact end goal and destination, but for me that time is coming to an end. I’ve been craving more purpose. I’ve been craving more growth and discovery. I’ve been craving more balance and living. So how will I achieve those things if I have not set myself up with the right tools, processes and environment for them; a solid foundation.

Nowadays the cost of living in major cities are skyrocketing, and a $50,000 annual salary here is like breadcrumbs, but the average starting annual salary according to sites like ZipRecruiter, for an entry level job in Ontario, is $31,770.¹ The Angus Reid Institute (ARI), a charitable independent research organization, did a study on ‘the gig economy’ in 2019, just before COVID-19. While 40 per cent of Canada’s millennials have participated in the gig economy, “nearly half of the respondents who said they “need” freelance and contract work were between the ages of 25 and 44”.² Added on top of that, is that the folks most actively participating in this work are those who are making under $50,000 annually and are already in precarious or uncertain financial positions. Leaving me to wonder when do you get to breath a sense of fulfilment or peace and live life, only after retirement? Bullshit.

I personally think the gig economy is a great and powerful new player in the working market. It puts power into the hands of the person, it can present unlikely opportunities, ideas and expansion. It can also cut-out some of the top-down financial favouring seen in most corporate businesses. But still, that means it is up to the person to make sure that it works for them, and there is no one-size-fits-all, or how-to on what that should look like. Ultimately, acknowledging this and working to find out what my perfect recipe will be is where I am at right now. I do not yet have the best structures in place and I am not quite yet where I hope to be, but all I can do is take the time to learn myself and what matters to me. Building a life for myself first, as a person; with support systems, resources, mentors, teachers, friends, peers and inspiration. If it was up to society we would be working until we die, so for me I am happy to let the work come and go, to let the money come and go and to let the success come and go. I am lucky to have been dropped at this point in my lineage, where I get to build a life that I believe is worth living, so I hope to be able to work hard towards celebrating it.

Song Highlight

I would love to know how you are reimagining your approach to work and success. I look forward to our next meeting of the minds. Think or share some gratitude today.

Share your thoughts with me by leaving a comment. Share your support by liking and sharing. xx

1. ZipRecruiter, Inc. “Entry Level Salary in Ontario, CA” Zip Recruiter. 2023, https://www.ziprecruiter.com/Salaries/Entry-Level-Salary-in-Ontario,CA#:~:text=As%20of%20Feb%2021%2C%202023,%2Fweek%20or%20%242%2C647%2Fmonth.

2. McNeil, Shane. “40% of Canada's millennials are part of 'the gig economy': Study” BNN Bloomberg. 26 Nov. 2019, https://www.bnnbloomberg.ca/40-of-canada-s-millennials-are-part-of-the-gig-economy-study-1.1353301

Martin, Roger. The Design of Business. Harvard Business Press, 2009.